Whitney Houston

Hey beautiful!

So last week my mind was bent on seeing Whitney (the movie) and it was worth it. There are some celebrities that seem relatable in a sense and most times I’m drawn to them. In Whitney’s case, it was a strong feeling.

After watching it, I encourage you to and will like to share some lessons inspired by the movie;

1. Most talented individuals know they have talent from an early age. It takes some form of cultivation and support to push and ignite it. Parents are usually the first to notice.

2. A mothers love can change a child’s life.

3. Discipline is never easy but necessary for change.

4. When a family starts to fall apart, the children suffer the most especially if in their formative years. Once you start becoming an adult though, I encourage you to get help to heal because no matter who you are, it does something to you.

5. Be careful of the company you keep. They are choices so pick wisely. Friends are not safety nets – you should be dependent yet independent.

6. Sexual fluidity is a thing. Be careful because curiosity can kill a cat. If your mind is not strong you might be confused about your sexual identity. Sexual trauma should also be dealt with if any i.e rape, molestation etc.

7. Money comes and goes. Do not let it define you.

8. Take care of family every chance you CAN.

9. The same way your friends matter, the person you chose to spend life with matters even more. They will either pull you up or pull you down.

10. Parents, prioritize your children and if not possible, find a way. They are the future and will honor you.

11. No matter where you find yourself, study the culture and try to adapt without losing yourself. It could be a new country, job etc.

12. Drugs….enough said.

13. Jealousy is a scary vice that makes the jealous individual ugly. If not careful, it can lead one to do evil things.

14. Failure is an event and not a definition of who you are.

15. Codependency is not love.

16. Be supportive but do not carry those around you be it family or friends.

17. Holding onto pain, eats you up and never the other. So your reaction to everything matters.

18. Death is inevitable. Parents prepare your children for it. It really is your responsibility. Don’t breed overly dependent and sheltered children.

19. Fix your childhood trauma or any after childhood. Deal with them, don’t suppress them and “fake move on”. They will creep up on you and can ruin your life. By childhood trauma it could be mental illness, molestation (which makes you question your sexuality), bullying, family divorce etc.

20. Shame is a powerful emotion. Empathy kills it so open up to safe loved ones.

You can be alive yet a zombie,

Just roaming earth,

Looking for yourself,

Not feeding anyone,

Running away from and to yourself,

Not knowing who you really are,

Money, people and love may be around you,

But as a zombie you won’t be able to feel or see these things and their value.

Take it easy my girl 🖤

OUTFIT DETAILS:

Top and shorts – Forever 21

Hair – Ali express

Fanny pack – Aldo

Advertisements

10 Life Lessons I learnt in October

Hey girl hey!

October has been crazy busy for me and I hope that you can forgive me because I just filled my calendar up with growth opportunities.

I just wanted to do it!

What you may ask?

Left my state temporarily, had midterms and needed a virtual break.

I’m back now and God always uses life to teach me things that help me get where I need to be in life and I appreciate him so much for staying by me.

Enjoy this list and let me know if any of these lessons help;

1. Life is borrowed. We all have an expiry dates so it all boils down to whether you lived well and made a significant impact in the world.

On that note, I decided to be more vulnerable with my posts and true to self because there is an audience I want to connect with and help grow. I really do not want any girls going through what I have gone through. Matter of fact, it won’t be fair to just go through life and keep all these experiences or mistakes I have learnt from.

The message here is ensure you live a good life. No one else is responsible for that but you.

2. Patience is a virtue that is unfortunately not common. With how tough life is, you will need to learn that if not already learnt because in dealing with people and life events, patience is required for understanding, learning and discernment.

Ask God to help you with being patient so that you can also be more accepting of others and their differences.

In essence, you will be a better person when you take your time with things and not rush through life. It’s already short to be honest so just chill.

3. Doubting one self is the beginning of confusion. When you do not stick to a decision made, it makes you question self trust and we all have to trust ourselves so that we can love ourselves better.

E.g I keep blocking and unblocking my ex and my brains always asks me what I’m looking for.

I wish I knew because in a matter of days after unblocking, I’m reminded of the reason I decided to just move on in the first place.

Imagine! Why break my own heart for no reason just because I won’t woman up and stick to a decision?! Ugh.

4. Respect others.

A person is made up of cells, family upbringing, life events, education and finally, religion. These are a lot of components we all know nothing about when you meet a person.

As you get to know them they share more about who they are but respect is important because you will not always agree and you have to be able to communicate and argue effectively without being rude.

I learnt this at work and it’s a stickler because I am now working on respecting others more.

5. Sex is not overrated (for those who said it was here’s why you might feel that way)

I got to this place where I had had enough but I had it with all the wrong people so I wasn’t even sure what a true connection felt like as opposed to just laying there and not being present.

Matter of fact it has gotten more difficult to just open my legs anyhow over temporary pleasure and semi permanent pain. I get the feelings sometimes and figure it out somehow but as I m growing with my self love journey, it is a sin as a Catholic so I do my best to preserve myself.

Not perfect but acknowledging it is a first step. In essence, close your legs so that when you do open them it feels right.

6. Pace your life

Everything happens in seasons. It ties into not rushing but it’s a different point because pacing/finding a balance often holds little weight with some of us. We fill our schedules with things to keep us from facing the deeper aspects of self that require attention i.e. connecting with people, mental health, fitness etc.

Make time for recreational activities, dream chasing and self care so that you can really feel healthy and fulfilled.

For me, I dropped one major because I was getting my masters degree in two fields and thought what is my end goal? Do I really care for this degree? Will I use it or I just want to please my parents? Since It held no true value, I took the stress and fake productivity off my plate and was able to reorganize better.

Another example was when my last relationship didn’t work out, I almost rushed through healing and wanted to replace him to fill that void but God forced me to stick with it, deal with the emotions by sending me a helper to understand why it happened so it doesn’t repeat itself.

7. The importance of family

Now all my friends know I can’t fully relate here because I’m from a semi mixed and separated family which has helped me more than hurt but I have to elaborate here.

There was a day I felt like I couldn’t talk to anyone but my sisters face kept flashing in my mind and I had convinced myself that she was too young to be there for me as a first born so I decided not to talk to her.

Days later, I wasn’t feeling any better and I just did it.

She advised me and cheered me up and it’s not a big deal but to me. I do not take the family I’m still close to for granted. Their happiness is mine and I know that I will never be alone as long as I have them. They empower me and make me feel whole.

Some friends do become family but in the end it is not the same. Blood is blood.

8. Women carry too much

This one was an eye opener because the expectations on women in our society today is ridiculous. We’re expected to have a 9-5, full on education, stay healthy (skinny even if possible), have kids, care for a spouse, keep the house in good shape, have a career etc.

Does this list ever end? Are we empowering men to do the same?

I’ll leave this here but as a millennial pick wisely. Personally my spouse (wherever he is) will need to show a level of understanding as I am an ambitious woman and there is a price.

I won’t be cooking daily bro but we can make a roster 😂

9. Dealing with People is a skill

I’ve met too many types of human beings and we are all beautifully flawed so i’ll share a tip that works for me.

I somehow figure out your birthday(Well, you tell me cus I ain’t no creep 😂) and because I’m spiritual, I believe in zodiacs so it gives me an idea of what your personality might be like.

E.g most cancers are extreme nurturers and come off super nice or guarded, Libras are charismatic and great at being diplomatic. Aquarius’ are helpers and Capricorn’s super stubborn plus love to be in control.

Off course, there is more but these are a few I’m super familiar with.

Over time, I match the personality with the life experiences you’ve shared with me and we grow as friends because I understand you better.

Try it out loves, it works!

10. When life burns you out or you get overwhelmed – prioritize you even more!

Sometimes it all gets so crazy with work, school, life etc but when you start feeling tired and demotivated, make sure you take a break and begin a scheduled self care routine. Do only what makes you happy and rejuvenate your spirit for newer and better girl.

With all that being said, I hope you can take away some things and incorporate them into your life tools for becoming an awesome person!

Love you 🖤

Addie.

Fall LookBook 1

Hey beautiful ladies!

Please find my first fall style lookbook below and enjoy the outfit ideas I put together.

Look 1

This is a casual look for a movie date or shopping with your girls. It was super comfortable and easy to move in.

Hoody dress – Forever 21

Leather Vest – Lane Bryant

Sneakers – Nike

Look 2

This outfit is more formal and can be worn to church, work(excluding the hat) and even brunch with parents.

Dress – Zara

Sleeveless blazer – Asos

Shoes – Payless

Tights – Lane Bryant

Hat – Aldo

Look 3

This outfit got so many compliments and is great for work and church on Sunday!

Covered, fall colors are included and off course sleeves are everything!

Top – Asos

Skirt – Nyandcompany

Heels – Madrag store

Look 4

This colorful number is great for work, networking events and even church despite its body hugging look.

I got this two piece suit from a store called ‘Envy U’ at Westview mall in Baltimore, Maryland on route 40.

Look 5

This outfit is cute and flirty.

I mixed prints to give it life and show my fun personality- it did just that!

Dress – Old Navy

Kimono – Forever 21

Hat – Gifted

Heels – Justfab

I hope you enjoyed this!

Stay tuned for Fall look-book two 😉

Much Love,

Curvaceous Addie.

The Importance of Protecting your Peace

IMG_1365.JPG

IMG_1344IMG_1349IMG_1350IMG_1353IMG_1357IMG_1364

Happy Saturday suscribers and new comers! I hope you are well.

Today’s post stresses the importance of protecting your peace and well being plus I’m sure you will enjoy this post because we all struggle with this depending on the type of person we are.  As I continue on my self love journey, I find that peace of mind is so essential to me and it affects every decision I make from dealing with people to how I feel at work and even my dating life because the minute I get a negative vibe, I remove myself from the situation especially when I am not fully/partially vested there.

Here is what I mean, it’s harder to remove myself from dealing with an ex because we have so much history as opposed to a new friend I just met but over time, I eventually get to it. Lately, I started to lose myself because I pushed me a little too much; I almost forced dating a guy I didnt even like, a friendship that didn’t appreciate my effort and even a business that almost overlooked my contributions to its success.

As I realized my worth and how I wanted to feel, I pushed back on almost everything and imagine the result! I’m glad I didn’t chase the friendship as God showed me as sign that allowed me understand it probably wasn’t for me. Dating that guy would have failed because I have to like you to be with you, why feel guilty saying no when it is the best decision anyway? Lastly, the business realized my importance after declining their initial offer and accepting a second offer which is what I deserve. How do I feel? At peace because I put me first, know my worth and listened to my gut.

So many blessings occur when you prioritize peace. See a few below;

  • A total glow up is acheived because you are well rested & self care is never neglected hence making better choices.
  • Stress management becomes easier because you are still when peace is present so one is able to deal with stress better than most.
  • It also assists us with maintaining happiness which requires constant and mindful effort.
  • Boosts self confidence.
  • Growth is also easier since one is focused enough to work on getting to where they really want to be.
  • Lastly, clarity. I cannot tell you how many decisions I have made that went well and even exceeded expectation because I was/am at peace.

    I’m sure you agree with me loves, If you haven’t been concerned about finding your peace then get to it please. I promise you will feel better and over time the blessings are unbelievable.

You begin to grow into yourself, you see clearly and can easily sense when something is not for you.

Have a great weekend loves and as always, checkout my instagram page, follow and suscribe for more inspiring posts!


Addie.